Lessons Prisha learnt

   

The lessons of life learnt together

Nothing in life comes and just leaves. It gives us experiences and lessons to learn from. Its up to us to just choose to go through them and let go or learn, imbibe and make changes accordingly in ourselves and move forward. These experiences are like blueprints to turn to when we are faced with similar or contrasting situations. 2.5 years at this school also were like that. Most important lessons of life learnt. Some scarred us for life and few just showed us our resilience, will power to fight just not the disability we faced but also the strength we had in us face not just as a family but also to see how Prisha changes with these difficult situations.
     It was an experience not just year or month wise but weekly, daily, hourly and at times every minute coz anything could happen anytime and it would just freak my life out. I was holding my phone like my baby while she was away at school. The phone was my only connection to her as she lived through a very hostile, isolating and negative atmosphere. The sounds of the messages gave me creeps and if they dropped faster, I would panic and run to check my messages. I have chatted her out of situations and complications and just kept going and hoping things would some day would be ok. But we learnt to be in touch and be available to her all the time. My talks, outings etc were all dependent on her. I went nowhere unless I was sure it was ok. It limited us as a family, got us insecure, frustrated, angry, isolated and we trusted no one. We questioned everyone around us and of course we needed help emotionally, psychologically and physically.
     Having said that, Prisha grew a lot in the time. She became extremely resilient and could read people and their actions. She knew what was going on in their heads. Her natural instincts were stronger, she became silent and needed fewer friends. She stopped trusting everyone and seemed to look beyond what they said. She knew that most people may seem sweet on the face but they were pretty nasty behind. She learnt that the world isn't the easiest place to be in and we need to be emotionally stronger to deal with bullies of all kinds. The adults are no less than kids when it comes to bullying. Few teachers smiled yet they hid an agenda at times. They said something yet meant and did something else. Hence when few were genuinely nice, she took times to break her barrier and once she did, she did exceedingly well in the subject. We knew her marks were directly proportional to the treatment she received at school.

     Prisha also learnt to reply back if needed be, though she just can't be rude. Yet she was learning and we felt that before she got any more negative and scarred, we move her out from the environment. I admire her resilience and will power which I never saw before. She became stronger and worked much harder. She fought her headaches caused by a noisy class and uncaring behaviour of students and teachers. She became a better planner with her school work as she did everything on her own. She wanted to prove to herself and everyone that she is as normal as anyone. She felt responsible for everything around her and managed despite odds. She faced dislike and hateful looks by people by herself and came home a little broken yet got back on her feet next day again. Her spirit was unbreakable. People don't understand that they are not breaking her but showing who they truly are. No one could take away her spirit instead they only strengthened her belief in herself and become even stronger. She became more empathetic and caring and stood for a couple of people who were shy or had issues with self esteem. Till date she is in touch with them and she tries to be as caring as she can be. She managed her 2.5 years with dignity and self respect. People who tried to pull her down have no idea how thankful we are to them as they showed us what a beautiful human being we have with us. She cares for the disadvantaged much more, she is loving and caring more than ever. She would write on her little white board her messages to pep herself each day. The insight she got from this time made her write deep thoughts that cropped in her head. She started to bring those out creatively by making posts like I do with photos that she clicked and edited. Isn't that a sign of a positive person? Despite being through hell and back, she found ways to inspire herself and we supported her through it. We understood her more and she knew her family would hold her when she fell. Through the teary and angry outbursts, she learnt also that its ok to be angry and let out steam but what is important is to move forward and learn lessons given by them. She learnt also that everyone has problems and no one has a perfect life, specially when she heard about other disadvantaged people. She says she has to work harder than everyone else but its so because she has the ability and strength to do it.

    We turned to music and art to calm her hurt soul. Found a teacher to help her learn the keyboard and I helped her to learn doodling and sketching. In school when no one talked to her or she was bored , she sat with her little diary to doodle and she came up with beautiful pieces. She found another talent in herself.She also learnt to play with clay given at school. While others played around, she messaged me to get guidance and we came up with ideas. She brought them home and we worked on them and she has beautiful hand posture sculptures. She grew positive despite negative environment, though she had questions and anger to which I had fewer answers. I wondered what the kids are being taught at home that they can be so mean to a child who is facing odds in life and has to fight odds handed over by them as well. I wonder why we don't teach our kids inclusion, empathy and tolerance. Why are kids envious and jealous? Why are adults having low tolerance and seem less empathetic? Why are they losing control and unable to teach the students the basics of human behaviour and compassion? Why are they unable to bring bullying down and instead defend bullies? Why are they unable to look into my eyes and answer the questions I have? Why do they have excuses when I want to meet them or need help? I have learnt that if you are strong, people would interpret it wrongly as they are unable to or are uncomfortable with the situation and prefer to escape. Most parents of bullies know their kids are being wrong yet they cry sob stories instead. Sooner or later it does come to light as few scared and kind souls will come and tell the truth and are afraid to say in the open for fear of bullies.
    As we have moved forward, we are happy we have a child who despite being disadvantaged by nature has been given other strengths which make us proud parents. We knew we were taking her away with head held high up as few still keep in touch to say what an amazing child she has been and how brave she was. In the big bad world after all, we have a mixed bag of people and few wrong people can definitely bring you down momentarily yet they help you grow as better human beings. Big lessons learnt and I think these 2.5 years shall be in memory forever of how one has the power inside to fight a whole mean world. It made us stronger, better and grateful people.