Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Tug at my heart - no signs for me, she says

Together through thick and thin

My princess, I love you !
    I have been a bit more firm last week with Prisha trying to get a hold on myself and her too and get back into action of learning after the long holiday. And she does get a bit nervous about it but knows that she needs to perform for her own good. So this afternoon I watched a dance programme from India on the internet to ease her and we both watched the lovely dance moves.
    And then this guy comes and dances with such passion that one of actor judges applauds him and calls his mother.It turned out that he came from the family of deaf.He is the only speaking person and they showed their struggle.He has this passion to stand out as he wants to make a career in it and make enough money to look after his family. The actor,applauds the efforts of the family and the boy's passion to prove himself through sign language. Everybody in the show, including me standing behind her, were moved to tears as life in India for a middle class handicapped person is not easy.After watching she looked up at me and asked me why I was crying. How do I tell her that had I not met Mrs.Hudlikar, probably without the right help, I too would have faced similar issues and I would have been deprived of hearing my girl's lovely voice?
     I then told her that the family was deaf, the boy talks and speaks and explained that how hard it was for them to live their life.They did not have hearing aids and so were soundless and speech less.For a moment she looked stunned,looked at the screen again and then looked at me with the most soulful look in her eyes and said softly " I want to hear and speak".I just had tears gushing and I hugged her tight .I then told her that I am firm with her about her learning and listening as I wanted to get her to be absolutely talking and why it was essential that I am firm.I asked her if its ok with her that I do not take    a wrong answer from her and I am upset if she made continuous mistakes,she nodded and just hugged me tighter.It was the most loving hug that we shared.
    She looked back at the screen again and asked me again "when I grow older, I would need bigger and better HA,would you still buy them for me, as I want to hear and speak, I don't want to sign? "
     I was shell shaken and hugged her tighter.My sweet Prisha, what ever be the cost, where ever we are, we are going to make sure, you have the best in hearing services and you would hear everything and speak non stop! We love your non stop chatter and can't wait to have you absolutely best in talking! Love it all.
    While in the shower, she started to sing,made her own song, does that often.Today's was
 " I want to sing and speak well, want to hear everything well, want to sing to my mom and dad" etc.
She then came out and said,another realization which she verbalized " mom, when I sing, I can't hear myself.You hear your voice when you sing, right? So now I would dry my ears , put on my hearing aids and then sing the song again, so that I can hear how it sounds."
     Awwwww, tears tears don't flow, my little baby is growing, realizing and the best part is she has been brought up in such a way that she isn't sorry about her handicap nor does she give up.Am so glad that we have a very spirited, loving and happy child who am sure would grow up to be the most loving person .She knows how hard I have worked with her and she supports it in many ways too, one of them being, caressing my head and sliding her little fingers through my hair..........heaven on earth!


  1. That's wonderful! It does sound like she's developing a very health attitude both toward having hearing loss and toward listening. Congratulations on all of her progress -- I know you've both worked so hard. Ben loves to sing all the time, too -- even when his hearing equipment is off.

  2. Thanks Julia, am glad too about it.I am very conscious that she should not be ashamed in any way about it but take it in her stride.We parents work so hard to make them happy in life and I am glad that our kids reflect our happiness too.

  3. And if she does decide to sign when she grows up? How will you handle that? I know, literally, hundreds of Deaf people who grew up as spoken language and did well, but chose to use sign when they become adults. So, what then?

  4. I have come across many people who grew up with one spoken language and have no place for signs in their lives and are very happy with that as they are able to communicate with everybody in that language and need no special training.That inspired me too.You can read my reasons for only spoken language on this post .But thank you for the concern,appreciate it.

  5. a beautiful relationship is a right of every child...it is great to see Prisha growing up to be secured, confident and empathetic- this cannot be taught but caught in our everyday interactions...you doing a great job as a mother and an inspiration to many mothers out there wanting the best for their children.

  6. Alright, that is definately an answer...too bad. I was hoping that you would say that you would work just as hard learning her language is she chose to sign....

  7. Prisha is very self-confident - a gift that every parent strives to give their children! I am sure that you will always be able to get hearing aids for her - she definitely values them and needs them. And she is a sweet little girl - her baking a cake for her brother was just so precious. What a sweetheart!

    Nolan sings constantly (whether his "ears" are in or not - he just gets a lot louder when they're off, lol)! We do use some signs, when sailing or at the beach - but Nolan has almost no interest in signing. He is definitely an auditory-based kiddo.

  8. I understand , we mothers do feel strongly believe in our beliefs,but we all have one goal...make sure the child leads an independent and normal life.Am glad Prisha and I share the same view and am sure it would work for us too.Thanks for your concern,makes me think again too. :)

  9. Thanks a lot Leah! Am glad to have this lil girl, she adds value to our lives, makes so happy.
    Can imagine Nolan singing, what pleasure to hear these lovely kids singing,have started to enjoy more.Auditory verbal definitely makes them more like normal kids and am glad Nolan is doing just THAT !He is adorable.

  10. I am the parent of an oral child as well, but, in truth, 85% of kids raised orally (with a severe or profound loss and hearing aids) end up needing and using sign in their life. It is a fact we all need to accept.

  11. It must be happening in US more as the use of signs is very prevalent,but in India,have yet to see many doing it in public places.One does not come across them.In Germany too, in the last 1 yr of I have come across only one couple who signs,in such a case, chances of her signing is very less.When an oral child is surrounded by oral people,very rare,he/she should slide back.If the statistics are to go by, why follow AVT at all, and I am aiming to be one of the 15 % if I go by statistics.Our decisions are entirely on life circumstances.I understand you concern and am hoping that my mission would be accomplished one day, like many others who are successfully leading lives.

  12. Rouchi, Even I am a parent of a deaf child and have undergone speech therapy classes under Mrs. Hudlikar in Pune - God bless her !! I am in full agreement with you that your Prisha will grow up into a fully oral person and will not need any other language sign or anything else. I have met some of Mrs. Hudlikar's senior students one is a qualified engineer travelling all over the world and is fully oral. He is 40 years old and is one of her first students. Hence keep walking lady !!