Our silent world

                As I sat one day thinking about my journey with Prisha, words just flowed and as did my tears. I can never forget at least those days. Much has been forgotten trying to deal with it, trying to cope with a loss, horror, nightmare and every word that comes with such moment. But these emotions are raw even today. That one day changed our life forever.
                Here were words from my heart as they poured and they have no format or rules, yet they tell a story of many mums like me. Its not my fault , not anyones' yet we hold ourselves responsible. I hope this poem resonates with mums like me as they are written from my heart and are "From my heart to yours". Sharing them makes me stronger as I know I am not alone. I fought many odds and today can stand taller with her hand in mine just like I promised her 12 winters before. May God give every mum who shares a journey like me a strength and will power to make it there. So here is the day of detection to the day I decided to fight it and make her speak and also sing. Hope it touches few hearts and inspires mums to never give up as you are your child's strength.

                                                   Our silent world

A promise I shall fulfill

It was a day our fears came true

She looked grim, shook her head

Told us about your silent world 

It hit me like a bolt from blue

Ton of bricks or was it a whirlwind

I felt the land below me slide

Every step falling into a ditch

My beautiful girl a gift of God

Fragile, puzzled , twinkled eyes

Your dimpled smile judging me. 

I clenched you tight 

Tears streaming down 

As I left that room

My world shattered 

My dreams now nightmares. 

My heart pounded in its case

Wondering at things that happened 

All my songs gone into the wind

My world suddenly silent

My laughter, chatter and music

Replaced by a silent gloom

Clouds of misery and darkness

Oh future, take me back in time

Tell me please it's all false 

Nightmare, curse or karma

Shake me , wake me from this all

Give me a miracle 

That shall end this all. 

Doesn't work that way, does it?

Reality bites and hard it does

Denial , crying, sleepless nights

Nothing changed the puzzled gaze

Dimpled smiles gone into past 

Pouted lips dying to smile. 

Hugged you close to give you hope

I am your mum and shall fight it all

You will hear, sing and laugh

Come what may in our path

Shall fight fate and give you sounds

Shall give you my songs, 

Will share our dreams

Will hold your hand tight and strong

walk together till end of time

You are my soul, I give you my voice. 

Held you close to my chest

Wiped my tears and I smiled 

You smile at me and lo behold

The dimpled cheek, pouted smile

Kissed your face and your nose

My fingers in your curls

My wet cheeks on yours 

I hold your heart tight to mine. 

Walk with me my little angel

Know not what holds tomorrow

Through thick and thin

I shall be your shadow 

Change the destiny 

Or just make another. 

A journey we partake henceforth on 

My gentle soul, my little love

This is ours and we shall win

A promise I know I shall fulfill.