Thank God, today I realised that by not giving in to her tantrum in class that day she has understood FOR NOW, that mom is not giving in to her without a reason.It was very tempting for me that day to actually accept her illogical demand where I knew what she wanted was wrong, and to have my peace of mind by giving in.At least I would not have a high blood pressure, a headache and the frustration.By not giving in that day and by showing her that I was not affected by her crying ,a point has been put across .It is in the long run for her benefit.For the momentary peace ,a wrong input was not encouraged.This morning I saw another tantrum coming, and I nipped it by warning her that I DON'T WANT ANOTHER TANTRUM.We spoke sitting across and it died a natural death.
I feel that this has to be instilled right from the birth of the child.The child needs constant attention and soon the child realises that all my moods affect people around me and specially my mom.So to get attention he starts to ,in his own little ways, get the situation under his control.In a typical scene at home,I noticed the moment I am on the phone or talking with the neighbour or am in a public place the child would ask for a thing which normally a mom would say no to.A bit of whining and mom givings in and a wrong message has been instilled and encouraged.I as a mom will have to sit and understand that the demand is ok to go with, or it is something you would not want to give in to.If you find the demand is something that is not be fulfilled then at no cost should we give in.By being firm on it ,after explaining the reason for it, we have driven a point in.If the child still insists a bit of tantrum would come in but we should not budge and still be firm on the decision.The reason has to be given, maintain your cool and by not loosing your head the child would after all the crying, would stop.It is important that when the child comes around ,do not melt till he has understood the reason for your denial and apologised.I remind her of the tantrum and that I am not giving in when the next one comes.I have realised I have sat down with my older son as a kid when we had an issue.I used a lot of words and explained sitting across.As a result he learnt to listen to my logic and is more receptive.We need to spend a lot of energy and our vocal chords from the beginning so the child is clear from the beginning.We tend to confuse the child by giving in sometimes at a wrong thing and sometimes being adamant.We have to consistent , for that a lot of patience is required but motherhood is not easy.We have a child's development in our hands.
Also with hearing impaired children people have this"o ,the poor child" syndrome.THE CHILD IS NOT SICK.we are pampering him.We tend to do everything for him.The family too also tends to have this poor thing attitude.Do not allow it.The deaf child learns to use it his advantage, in school, home and all places.They have to be given that much language .I see it as a speech therapy session.I by using the language ,intonation and expression am able to get across a hearing impaired child.We feel it is difficult and straining to speak to a deaf child and so let go off the tantrum.I remember one thing ....After she wears hearing aids , SHE IS NOT DEAF.She like any normal child and so it becomes easy to talk to her and give her the language.The bottomline is -Do not confuse the child , be consistent.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Friday, January 25, 2008
Child's Tantrum
Today I had undergone a very difficult part of child control.What when a child throws a tantrum?Are we not embarrassed, emotionally drained , torn and frustrated?All of us go through it.
Well I had this showdown at Mrs. Alaka Hudlikar's place.Prisha normally is very receptive and ready to talk.But y'day she was sleepy and a bit too tired and for a small reason she decided she wanted my attention in a lecture in the therapy class.I gave her the answers but refused to take my answer and started to cry which later turned into a tantrum.She wanted her way out and I would not bend down to her demands.It disturbed the whole class and ma'am alaka and I decided to not give in.It was very difficult and I had undergone a very traumatic time .Today we discussed it in the class and realised that she wanted to control the whole situation.Children are very clever and easily manipulate the situation and their moms to their advantage.If we give in it affects their emotional growth a lot.By giving in we show the child that with the loud crying she is powerful enough to get what she wants.We have to bend her to our ways and not give in to illogical demands.By giving in we are encouraging wrong behavior and she would never learn the right social behavior.We have to instill the right attitude by being firm.By the end of the day Prisha had come around and apologised for her tantrum.Next tantrum would be easier as she has realised being 4 yrs old that Mom is not going to give in.I have realised the more you give in the bigger the next tantrum.If the child is controlled from the beginning she would not get in to a fit and is more socially accepted.Today she is more easy to handle.I have done it many times that there were times she would cry for no reason and was adamant for an illogical reason.I would send her in a corner and IGNORED the whole tantrum and crying.After a while she would quieten down and the go about her activities or say sorry for the fault.Initial times the crying and the fit would be for 30 mins the 20 mins and soon she realised I would not give in cried for a few secs and then came to terms.The fight for the mastery over the issue stops.There has to be a logical reason and we as parents need to know when and how much to give in.My lesson on this was revisited and learnt and reconfirmed.
Well I had this showdown at Mrs. Alaka Hudlikar's place.Prisha normally is very receptive and ready to talk.But y'day she was sleepy and a bit too tired and for a small reason she decided she wanted my attention in a lecture in the therapy class.I gave her the answers but refused to take my answer and started to cry which later turned into a tantrum.She wanted her way out and I would not bend down to her demands.It disturbed the whole class and ma'am alaka and I decided to not give in.It was very difficult and I had undergone a very traumatic time .Today we discussed it in the class and realised that she wanted to control the whole situation.Children are very clever and easily manipulate the situation and their moms to their advantage.If we give in it affects their emotional growth a lot.By giving in we show the child that with the loud crying she is powerful enough to get what she wants.We have to bend her to our ways and not give in to illogical demands.By giving in we are encouraging wrong behavior and she would never learn the right social behavior.We have to instill the right attitude by being firm.By the end of the day Prisha had come around and apologised for her tantrum.Next tantrum would be easier as she has realised being 4 yrs old that Mom is not going to give in.I have realised the more you give in the bigger the next tantrum.If the child is controlled from the beginning she would not get in to a fit and is more socially accepted.Today she is more easy to handle.I have done it many times that there were times she would cry for no reason and was adamant for an illogical reason.I would send her in a corner and IGNORED the whole tantrum and crying.After a while she would quieten down and the go about her activities or say sorry for the fault.Initial times the crying and the fit would be for 30 mins the 20 mins and soon she realised I would not give in cried for a few secs and then came to terms.The fight for the mastery over the issue stops.There has to be a logical reason and we as parents need to know when and how much to give in.My lesson on this was revisited and learnt and reconfirmed.
Friday, January 18, 2008
twist the question
Last class ma'am put forth a very important aspect of teaching children.When we teach children or in school teachers would question the child which is most predictable to a child eg.Name 5 flowers or name a few animals or name the beings which have tails etc.The child has over the years memorized the answers and know the pattern of the question and know the sequence of answers.The way to know the extent of the child's understanding is to question with a twist.Eg.What are bull, tiger,giraffe and elephant.Or jasmine, rose, daisies- what are these?Mostly the child would go blank.It is important the learns to understand that everything belongs to a class.He should understand the class name.We can classify everything into different class names be it furniture, food, building, direction,etc.It helps to simplify.One may not know a certain object but if I specify the class name it helps to understand to an extent.Eg.a child may not understand dinosaurs , but the moment I say it is an animal and not a flower the search is easier.So it is very important to teach the child class name and to question the child with a twist.
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Narration
A very important part of speech development is NARRATION.How do we know the capacity of speech in a child?How do we come to know that a child is able to communicate?How do we judge the child's understanding of spoken language and the perception.
The only way of knowing is through comprehension of narration.As with comprehension comes expression of thoughts i.e. speech.The process involves- listening to everything, registering that , remembering it through language and then be able to narrate it in the language he/ she has acquired ,age appropriate.The comprehension is best checked when it is out of context .Talk to the child about an incident or a subject that is not around or out of the blue.Then see whether s/he is able to even understand what you are talking, give them hints in spoken language and then ask them to speak about it.I have realized that if the incident has been carefully and in detail told to the child, s/he through good detailing learns to visualize it and retains it in the brain.When we ask them to remember it they are able to relate better and even though may not be able to fully narrate it but using their own language are able to make out and narrate it quite accurately.It is a good idea to regularly ask them to narrate a birthday party they went to, a shopping experience or a day in class.Do correct where required and give words and sentences where they falter.
The only way of knowing is through comprehension of narration.As with comprehension comes expression of thoughts i.e. speech.The process involves- listening to everything, registering that , remembering it through language and then be able to narrate it in the language he/ she has acquired ,age appropriate.The comprehension is best checked when it is out of context .Talk to the child about an incident or a subject that is not around or out of the blue.Then see whether s/he is able to even understand what you are talking, give them hints in spoken language and then ask them to speak about it.I have realized that if the incident has been carefully and in detail told to the child, s/he through good detailing learns to visualize it and retains it in the brain.When we ask them to remember it they are able to relate better and even though may not be able to fully narrate it but using their own language are able to make out and narrate it quite accurately.It is a good idea to regularly ask them to narrate a birthday party they went to, a shopping experience or a day in class.Do correct where required and give words and sentences where they falter.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
A tribute
Today my teacher Mrs.Hudlikar said that many of her old friends and relatives called her up to tell her about the article in 'Femina'.They said that after reading the article they understood the kind of job she did.......finally after all these years!Last 40 years she has been practicing speech therapy and it is now they understood.I think it came at the right time, A hindi movie called 'Taare zameen pe' meaning 'stars on earth' has just got released.It is about a dyslexic child and the teacher.Having Aamir Khan- a perfectionist doing it , it would be very close to reality.These 2 things together may change a few people's perception about a condition in children.I was so happy to hear that she was happy the way I wrote it , simple language and coming straight from the heart.People called up to say how they liked it and that made me happy.I am sure people who have read it and have hearing impaired kids will connect to it, as it is a national magazine and that too popular one it will reach out.
These days I feel Prisha is a bit lazy and does not want to speak full sentences.I too sometimes loose it and feel a bit too tired doing it for 3 years now.But it is a phase all mom go through with hearing impaired children.They are scared to let go of their speech practice as the kids regress very quickly.I have realised I need to keep pace constantly for her to progress.I too am human and being a mom and seeing the kid struggle to put a full sentence makes me work harder.I really pray for the science to emerge much ahead in stem cell so there would not be any deaf child in the world.Amen to that
These days I feel Prisha is a bit lazy and does not want to speak full sentences.I too sometimes loose it and feel a bit too tired doing it for 3 years now.But it is a phase all mom go through with hearing impaired children.They are scared to let go of their speech practice as the kids regress very quickly.I have realised I need to keep pace constantly for her to progress.I too am human and being a mom and seeing the kid struggle to put a full sentence makes me work harder.I really pray for the science to emerge much ahead in stem cell so there would not be any deaf child in the world.Amen to that
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
My brush with stardom
One of the most exciting week was the xmas week.Two big moments- one my little girl got admission in a normal school on her own merit.It was a very emotional moment to think that it was not because of sibling preference she got into school but because they found her capable .I was so ectasic.I got a lot of compliments as well as congrats and I found the last 3 years of struggle paying me back.My lil girl made me proud.I felt it was my big exam result.The interview had gone very well and we had got a lot of aplauding from the school.I was 90 % sure that we would get through but the moment I got the big result on the computer i rubbed my eyes and checked it at least 5 times.I hugged her tight as it was she whoi was giving me that moment of pride.
2nd big thing was we got featured in the magazine called" Femina".We had full 3 pages to ourselves.The pictures came well and everybody has been congratulating me on them and the write up.Some felt touched, some had tears, some happy ,some felt it coming from the heart but everyone appreciated the fact that I wanted to share my story with the world to show how hearing impairment does not stop your life.The way it has been featured is good as the pictures show us so happy with life and the story was so touching.A total contrast.I am thankful to God and my little girl for showing me this day.I cannot thank Him for showing me a way in life that led to Mrs. Alaka Hudlikar who has made it possible for her to talk.Today i feel so much confidance in myself that I had lost over the years after my marriage.She has made it possible to help me believe in myself and to say YES to life.I have become a better person thanks to the 2 women in my life - my girl and my teacher.I pray that every hearing impaired child gets a teacher like her.The year has ended in some very proud moments.
2nd big thing was we got featured in the magazine called" Femina".We had full 3 pages to ourselves.The pictures came well and everybody has been congratulating me on them and the write up.Some felt touched, some had tears, some happy ,some felt it coming from the heart but everyone appreciated the fact that I wanted to share my story with the world to show how hearing impairment does not stop your life.The way it has been featured is good as the pictures show us so happy with life and the story was so touching.A total contrast.I am thankful to God and my little girl for showing me this day.I cannot thank Him for showing me a way in life that led to Mrs. Alaka Hudlikar who has made it possible for her to talk.Today i feel so much confidance in myself that I had lost over the years after my marriage.She has made it possible to help me believe in myself and to say YES to life.I have become a better person thanks to the 2 women in my life - my girl and my teacher.I pray that every hearing impaired child gets a teacher like her.The year has ended in some very proud moments.
Monday, December 10, 2007
Introduction to the sounds
When I first started my speech therapy lessons with my teacher I really wondered what she would teach a 1 yr old child who was soundless and speechless for so long.I was not too sure as to what she planned for me.It was a small group of 3-4 children is various age groups and I honestly doubted her.Little did I realise that it was an introduction to the classes to come.She wanted me to get used to her firm ways and understand her interaction with the children.
She told me about how the child had missed out 1 full year and she had no idea of the things around her.She knows things visually and had no idea of the name of the things.We do things and we think of everything in language.It is the most important part of the human beings.Language development is a very intellectual activity of the brain and all human beings are designed to function with it.It is so important as even to think we need language, to recollect ,to store in a memory we need language and if we don't have language of things around us ,they just seem to happen in front of us and they pass away as the moments go by. We can never describe it to anybody and nobody will understand with out the proper use of language.Also it has a system.we just cannot use words, we need to form grammatically correct sentences for others to understand .So it is important that speech therapy is conducted and it has to be done systematically.
I feel as the child has lost out time , we need to introduce her to the language the moment the hearing aids are put.It is essential the the child should were hearing aids 1st thing in the morning and wear it the entire day and should be removed the last thing at night.The moment the aids are on start to talk about things around you but it also has to be age appropriate.Most audiologist will say talk something interesting or talk lots.The question by most mothers is TALK WHAT?
Well the answer is talk of things around you.I remember talking all the time to my girl of everything around.I would wake her up and say very pleasantly of how the sun was out and it was time to wake up.We would talk about how she slept through the night and then she would freshen up , milk time, potty time and kept nothing in mind but I just used a lot of facial expression and my voice had to have that excitement to excite her to listen to me.I needed to draw her attention and only way of doing it was by talking in a way that would make her interested.We too would listen to a person who talks well with a certain expression and really ignore a person who is just droning off.For the child everything is new and for us it is boring and experienced but once we realise that the child has never felt and seen these things, we can go down to their level and feel the same excitement.Automatically thing will start flowing.We need to excite ourselves and see things from their angle and surely nothing is boring.
Secondly we were introduced to 2 very important words my ma'am.......LISTEN and LOOK. It is so important that the child learns these two words. They help in drawing the child's attention and their reflexes also sharpen up.This a tried and tested experience and I feel I owe a lot of my girl's learning to these 2 words.I would hold her in my arms and show her things.Being close to me I was sure I had her full attention and with my other hand I pointed out at things to associate sound with the action.eg,"Baby look"[ pointing out at an object-she would look there immediately] "look there , a cat is climbing the tree"I would let her soak it in."did you see?O look that cat, it climbing up slowly, up up the tree."the whole time trying to enact out the climbing and using a lot expression and using the appropriate intonation depicting excitement.She would love to listen and get so excited.Or"look baby, look at these flowers,so beautiful."Slowly she and i got so good with this that whenever I point anywhere and say look she leaves everything and looks there.If she did not listen to me I would tell her "Listen, I am talking to you"It takes a while but believe me it really works.I will expand on this more in the next post.
She told me about how the child had missed out 1 full year and she had no idea of the things around her.She knows things visually and had no idea of the name of the things.We do things and we think of everything in language.It is the most important part of the human beings.Language development is a very intellectual activity of the brain and all human beings are designed to function with it.It is so important as even to think we need language, to recollect ,to store in a memory we need language and if we don't have language of things around us ,they just seem to happen in front of us and they pass away as the moments go by. We can never describe it to anybody and nobody will understand with out the proper use of language.Also it has a system.we just cannot use words, we need to form grammatically correct sentences for others to understand .So it is important that speech therapy is conducted and it has to be done systematically.
I feel as the child has lost out time , we need to introduce her to the language the moment the hearing aids are put.It is essential the the child should were hearing aids 1st thing in the morning and wear it the entire day and should be removed the last thing at night.The moment the aids are on start to talk about things around you but it also has to be age appropriate.Most audiologist will say talk something interesting or talk lots.The question by most mothers is TALK WHAT?
Well the answer is talk of things around you.I remember talking all the time to my girl of everything around.I would wake her up and say very pleasantly of how the sun was out and it was time to wake up.We would talk about how she slept through the night and then she would freshen up , milk time, potty time and kept nothing in mind but I just used a lot of facial expression and my voice had to have that excitement to excite her to listen to me.I needed to draw her attention and only way of doing it was by talking in a way that would make her interested.We too would listen to a person who talks well with a certain expression and really ignore a person who is just droning off.For the child everything is new and for us it is boring and experienced but once we realise that the child has never felt and seen these things, we can go down to their level and feel the same excitement.Automatically thing will start flowing.We need to excite ourselves and see things from their angle and surely nothing is boring.
Secondly we were introduced to 2 very important words my ma'am.......LISTEN and LOOK. It is so important that the child learns these two words. They help in drawing the child's attention and their reflexes also sharpen up.This a tried and tested experience and I feel I owe a lot of my girl's learning to these 2 words.I would hold her in my arms and show her things.Being close to me I was sure I had her full attention and with my other hand I pointed out at things to associate sound with the action.eg,"Baby look"[ pointing out at an object-she would look there immediately] "look there , a cat is climbing the tree"I would let her soak it in."did you see?O look that cat, it climbing up slowly, up up the tree."the whole time trying to enact out the climbing and using a lot expression and using the appropriate intonation depicting excitement.She would love to listen and get so excited.Or"look baby, look at these flowers,so beautiful."Slowly she and i got so good with this that whenever I point anywhere and say look she leaves everything and looks there.If she did not listen to me I would tell her "Listen, I am talking to you"It takes a while but believe me it really works.I will expand on this more in the next post.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Awareness
It is amazing that in this age of communication and technology , how 'sign language' is still so popular.Why is it that we are not not making people aware that children are talking?They can be integrated into normal life with absolutely no use of sign language and lip reading.Why are the audiologist not spending their energy and resources into bringing in "AVT"?Auditory verbal therapy has given my daughter and my family a fresh lease of life.When I hear of sign language I shudder to think of how I would have lost the chance of hearing my pretty daughter's voice and her singing. We do not feel her hearing impairment many times.Her speech is clearing and her thoughts come out in her own language without my prompting.I do correct her when she does not get her thoughts right at times though.
Y'day my teacher had gone to a child welfare association's programme for the handicap.She was so disappointed as all they did was put up programmes by the DEAF AND DUMB kids.Yes it is encouraging them and motivating them to live , but are we not restricting their life by giving them "sign language'?Do they not deserve to live a normal life? Today they are in the care of the centre and are able to manage within the protected environment of centre, home and family.But what happens tommorow when they are adults and have to lead an independent life?How many normal people will understand them?How many will pity them, isolate them as it is a botheration to understand and make yourself understand and actually will they not feel "different and handicapped"?Why are we not working towards getting them to be accepted by making the effort.If their are people who are talking and their is a technique to make them hear and talk and understand , why are the audiologist still not working on that.Why are we still cochlear implanting people when people like my teacher are making deaf children talk despite their profound loss of hearing and that too with ordinary hearing aids?Are we not still encouraging the old system when we are able to through internet find out all the information.Through blogging and "youtube" I have listened to so many children talk and sing.
People wake up.We need to integrate the deaf people into normal lives.Do not make them 'different' and isolate them by giving them a different language as how many people would have to learn their language in order to let them be independent and make them feel normal. Let us empower them by giving them the language of the masses.Once they understand the language of the masses they are no longer DEAF AND DUMB, they are not even DEAF, they are just hearing impaired as good hearing aids have given them the power to hear and AVT has given them the power to understand and speak.They are just left with a condition of 'hearing impairment', they are no longer HANDICAPPED.
I want to share an incident that one of the moms of hearing impaired told us.Her teenage daughter was told to take part in a drawing competition in the handicapped category.Promptly the gutsy girl replied 'I am not a handicapped person, I can hear and understand and speak everything so why are you putting me in that category?'Hats off and what an inspiring tale.Irony is why should a hearing impaired child be in the first place be put in a handicapped category for a drawing competition.Their hands and feet are all ok and they can draw using their fingers. I am glad that that girl does not think she is a handicapped person.
The down side of this is that such children go to normal schools and so are not aware and are not able to avail a lot of aid given to deaf and dumb children.The institutions for such children put up shows like this and all the government aids go to such institutions and not always does it go to the deserving people.I wish their was more empathy and tranceparency in India.
Y'day my teacher had gone to a child welfare association's programme for the handicap.She was so disappointed as all they did was put up programmes by the DEAF AND DUMB kids.Yes it is encouraging them and motivating them to live , but are we not restricting their life by giving them "sign language'?Do they not deserve to live a normal life? Today they are in the care of the centre and are able to manage within the protected environment of centre, home and family.But what happens tommorow when they are adults and have to lead an independent life?How many normal people will understand them?How many will pity them, isolate them as it is a botheration to understand and make yourself understand and actually will they not feel "different and handicapped"?Why are we not working towards getting them to be accepted by making the effort.If their are people who are talking and their is a technique to make them hear and talk and understand , why are the audiologist still not working on that.Why are we still cochlear implanting people when people like my teacher are making deaf children talk despite their profound loss of hearing and that too with ordinary hearing aids?Are we not still encouraging the old system when we are able to through internet find out all the information.Through blogging and "youtube" I have listened to so many children talk and sing.
People wake up.We need to integrate the deaf people into normal lives.Do not make them 'different' and isolate them by giving them a different language as how many people would have to learn their language in order to let them be independent and make them feel normal. Let us empower them by giving them the language of the masses.Once they understand the language of the masses they are no longer DEAF AND DUMB, they are not even DEAF, they are just hearing impaired as good hearing aids have given them the power to hear and AVT has given them the power to understand and speak.They are just left with a condition of 'hearing impairment', they are no longer HANDICAPPED.
I want to share an incident that one of the moms of hearing impaired told us.Her teenage daughter was told to take part in a drawing competition in the handicapped category.Promptly the gutsy girl replied 'I am not a handicapped person, I can hear and understand and speak everything so why are you putting me in that category?'Hats off and what an inspiring tale.Irony is why should a hearing impaired child be in the first place be put in a handicapped category for a drawing competition.Their hands and feet are all ok and they can draw using their fingers. I am glad that that girl does not think she is a handicapped person.
The down side of this is that such children go to normal schools and so are not aware and are not able to avail a lot of aid given to deaf and dumb children.The institutions for such children put up shows like this and all the government aids go to such institutions and not always does it go to the deserving people.I wish their was more empathy and tranceparency in India.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Mindset
Today ma'm was pretty upset as the new moms were not following what she has been telling them for so long.It is sad , as a little firmness in tone does make all the difference in the child's attitude.We learn to pamper our kids so much fearing that they already have a deficiency , so we must not hurt them more.It is true that this attitude really handicaps the child.That firm tone and the sharp tone, the expressions in my voice has made my girl very expressive and has learnt to react accordingly.The child should with the tone and expression and intonation know the meaning and feel of the topic.Slowly he\she learns to understand the words that fill the sentence.
Ma'm by being does never mean hit the child or punish him.It is to show the disapproval.Chlidren react to mom's expressions the most, they want to always please her.It takes a while to get that message across to the child that he has to listen , but once it goes through , the child gets into that mind frame of learning.As a mom I too hated initially to correct the POOR child, hurt her, not to cajole her all the the time, but now I am realising the its benefits. My girl reacts to everything faster and does have a right frame of mind to learn.She realises the importance of my corrections.It takes , to my experience about 1 yr for the child to get the message that mom means business and she follows just about any instruction that I give her.Every body in my family says that she only listens to me , but has anybody made that effort for her to listen to them?It was very difficult for them to be firm.I am her mom, imagine how tough it must have been for me.But today I am happy.I thank my mom for this .She too was a tough mom and so it made me a good and strong person.I got the right values.I love my girl immensely and being firm and a disciplinarian does not make me love her any less.Today because of my strict nature she has reached ahead when she can integrate into normal atmosphere.Because I love her , I am strict with her.A strict teacher in school has the best results from her students.So go ahead if you love your child for his\her sake be firm and ask for results.Push her to perform and never be satisfied with anything less.
Ma'm by being does never mean hit the child or punish him.It is to show the disapproval.Chlidren react to mom's expressions the most, they want to always please her.It takes a while to get that message across to the child that he has to listen , but once it goes through , the child gets into that mind frame of learning.As a mom I too hated initially to correct the POOR child, hurt her, not to cajole her all the the time, but now I am realising the its benefits. My girl reacts to everything faster and does have a right frame of mind to learn.She realises the importance of my corrections.It takes , to my experience about 1 yr for the child to get the message that mom means business and she follows just about any instruction that I give her.Every body in my family says that she only listens to me , but has anybody made that effort for her to listen to them?It was very difficult for them to be firm.I am her mom, imagine how tough it must have been for me.But today I am happy.I thank my mom for this .She too was a tough mom and so it made me a good and strong person.I got the right values.I love my girl immensely and being firm and a disciplinarian does not make me love her any less.Today because of my strict nature she has reached ahead when she can integrate into normal atmosphere.Because I love her , I am strict with her.A strict teacher in school has the best results from her students.So go ahead if you love your child for his\her sake be firm and ask for results.Push her to perform and never be satisfied with anything less.
Monday, November 26, 2007
A new lesson
Last week I tried a new concept of ' WHY '.It is very difficult to make a 3 yr old this concept.It is not something you can touch or feel.After a long thought , I tried asking her questions relating to her.Eg..Why do you want food?[when she asked me for it].She started to think and said..I don't know.I gave her the answer....Because I am hungry.Of course I wanted a full sentence each time.The same I tried with sleep, thirst,going to park etc, things she can relate too.It is also important that one uses it at the right time ,that is, at a time when she wants that particular thing, so that explaining is easy.I also use a lot of negative cross questioning.eg
You want to go to the park because you want to sleep?
she says at once...noooooo, because I want to go to the swing.
It works with most questions.A small child like that needs a lot of explaining but soon learns to understand the concept.
You want to go to the park because you want to sleep?
she says at once...noooooo, because I want to go to the swing.
It works with most questions.A small child like that needs a lot of explaining but soon learns to understand the concept.
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